Crazy Brittanalyst Grab-Bag: Part LVII

My Ask box is, as always, an unmitigated disaster zone. Oops.

1. Hey, Anon!

So I see evidence that Brittany Pierce is intelligent everywhere, but I understand that not everyone feels the same as I do.

Brittany’s intelligence, as I see it, manifests through nuance—through figurative language and in tricks of speech; it isn’t obvious on the surface or if you take what Brittany says at face value.

That being said, not everybody views Brittany’s statements the way I do.

However, regardless of what one believes concerning Brittany’s intelligence, the fact is that Brittany does use metaphors—it’s canon on the show.

Nowhere is this clearer than in episode 3x02, where Brittany refers to Kurt as her “precious unicorn.”

Obviously, Brittany does not believe that Kurt is an actual unicorn. She knows he is not. So when she says that he’s a unicorn? She means something other than what’s literal—i.e., she means the word as a metaphor. And in this case? For Brittany, the word “unicorn” is a metaphor for someone who is different from other people, but special because he or she is different. A unicorn is someone who believes in him or herself, even when faced with adversity.

Brittany tells us all this herself in plain language, right at the start of the episode, when she says: “A unicorn is someone who knows they’re magical and isn’t afraid to show it.”

Right there? That’s a metaphor.

So we know that Brittany does use metaphors.

If she uses a metaphor in 3x02, then it stands to reason she might use metaphors elsewhere—the question is just to what extent she uses them.

For me, personally? I see Brittany’s metaphors everywhere. But other people? They might not see it. I feel that the evidence we’ve been given on the show supports the fact that Brittany is intelligent—just not in the “usual” way or in a way that’s easily recognizable to most people.

Santana agrees with me—she thinks Brittany’s a genius. And since Santana knows Brittany better than anybody else? I tend to think she has a point.

Within the fandom, I’m not the only proponent of the idea that Brittany is smart, either—many other Brittana fans feel the same way (see here).

Ultimately, it comes down to perception and enjoyment, Anon: Personally, I perceive that Brittany is smart, based on my understanding of her language and behavior, and I derive more enjoyment from the show than I would otherwise in believing that Brittany is intelligent and attempting to understand her as a character based on that premise. You and your friends or others might not feel the same way.

Anyway, I hope this answers your question. Thanks for writing in!

2. Hey, Anon!

Thank you so much for your kind message and for taking the time to write to me. I’m glad you enjoy my blog! I too am one who enjoys Brittana fic. We’ve certainly gotten a lot of excellent stories lately, haven’t we?

3. Anon, if the wedding happens, this must happen also. I need it. 

4. Hey, Anon!

So Brittany says that line in reference to the Our Lady of Perpetual Sorrow Golden Goblets madrigal choir. Madrigal choirs sing without musical instruments accompanying them—they’re acapella groups.

Brittany’s joke is funny because she apparently misses the fact that the Golden Goblets don’t actually have any musical instruments playing for their song; she makes it sound like she thinks it was an accident that the audience couldn’t hear any musical instruments playing with the group, when they actually had it that way on purpose.

Of course, I tend to believe that Brittany was just messing with Puck because she knows that the madrigals, though talented in their own field, don’t really have a chance to win a big time show choir competition.

Hope this helps! Thanks for writing in.

5. Smiling like a goon now, Anon, BRB…

6. Hey, AJ!

Honestly? I don’t analyze Sebastian, so I can’t speak to his motivations as a character—and especially not after last night, when his actions seemed so wildly disparate from everything we’d seen from him before, up to this point.

All I can say is that Santana is right when she says that Sebastian is basically a bad 80s high school movie villain, as bad 80s high school movie villains always try to beat the good guys once, only to have the good guys foil their plans. The villains then retreat, blaming their rotten luck for their failures, only to come back at the end of the movie or in the sequel and try to get the good guys one last time.

It’s like Sebastian swallowed the Evil Overlord List or something.

The thing is that Sebastian is very predatory in his villainy, and, like a predator, he strikes at what he perceives to be the weakest members of the group; having already attacked Kurt, whom he views as sensitive and melodramatic, in 3x11—and having wounded Blaine instead—Sebastian goes after Rachel in 3x14. The way he sees it? Rachel is a weak link in the New Directions chain; she’s so infatuated with her fiancé that she’ll sacrifice her own future and wellbeing to be with him. Accordingly, Sebastian attacks Rachel through Finn.

Just as Sebastian misjudges Santana in 3x11 (see here), he also misjudges Rachel in 3x14; Sebastian believes that Rachel will choose Finn over everything, underestimating Rachel’s ambition and drive to win.

In misjudging and underestimating Rachel, Sebastian also misjudges and underestimates Santana and the rest of the New Directions, thinking that they will sit back passively and watch Sebastian sabotage their chances at Regionals through Rachel.

Sebastian doesn’t count on the facts that a) Rachel will not cave to his demands or cheap “show choir terrorism,” and that, b) her friends will defend her and their team to Sebastian, damn the consequences.

I think Sebastian probably doesn’t even consider that Santana would defend Rachel Berry, the girl who annoys her most in the world, and Finn Hudson, the boy who outed her at her school, because, like most people, Sebastian erroneously believes that Santana is a bad person; he doesn’t understand that, even though Finchel annoy the everloving hell out of Santana and have deeply wounded her in the past, she will defend them because they’re her family, and nobody messes with the New Directions and gets away with it when Santana is around.

As for what Santana might do if Sebastian had chosen to target her instead of Rachel with this plot? Really, I don’t know. I tend to think that Santana would actually go the legal route—i.e., she would compile evidence of Sebastian’s plot and then turn him in to the Ohio Show Choir Board, as per that rule Artie cited from the handbook. She might even sue him for extortion and threatening defamation of character. 

Santana Lopez knows her rights; she wouldn’t let him get away with that shit, if it were her—and especially not if Sebastian involved Brittany.

She would go all [legal] Lima Heights.

But that’s just my speculation.

Anyway, rock and roll! Thanks for writing in, AJ.

7. Hey, Anon!

I honestly have no idea what the writers have planned for Brittany in upcoming episodes. According to Naya’s tweet from today, we’ll get some Brittana scenes after the hiatus, but I don’t know if that means that we’ll see any President Brittany or in what capacity the episodes will use Brittany. I certainly hope that the writers will make use of Brittany’s office for her storyline, but I don’t know that they will.

Sorry I can’t be more definitive. Thanks for writing in!