So headcanon says that Brittana are superheroes and nobody can tell me otherwise.

So Sebastian Warbler shows up. Not only does he insult Santana’s class and ethnicity when he first meets Santana in the Lima Bean, but he also trash talks the New Directions, puts down Santana’s teammates, steals the New Directions’ idea for Regionals, and then he up and assaults Blaine Warbler with a laced slushie at the parking garage.

Of everyone in the glee club, Santana Lopez has always been the one most likely to cry foul in situations where she senses inequality and injustice. She hates it when people take credit for things that they didn’t do themselves. She hates it when people take things that aren’t their own. She hates losing at her own games. She hates losing period. She hates it when people make her feel small, weak, ineffectual, and unimportant.

So Sebastian Warbler? He’s on her list.

Cut to Brittana having a chat the night after Blaine gets slushied.

They lie on Santana’s bed, half tangled in each other’s limbs, because that’s what they always do.

Santana fumes because Sebastian is such a twitchy little ferret whose dad bought his way onto the team with Nimbus 2001’s. She’s frustrated that there’s no way for the New Directions to pin Sebastian for what he did to Blaine. She’s upset about Regionals. She feels like she has no control and she fucking hates that.

“Ugh! I just wish there was something we could do!” she says, pounding her balled fists on the bed.

For her part, Brittany isn’t cool with this whole situation, either. She doesn’t like people messing with her friends anymore than Santana does, plus she hates seeing Santana so upset; she wants to do something to help.

Now.

Brittany knows Santana better than anyone in the world and one of the things she knows about Santana is that Santana is a doer—if Santana isn’t actively working towards a goal or trying to fix a problem when she encounters it, Santana flails. Santana needs objectives in order to feel secure.

So Brittany comes up with an objective.

“So what if we did something?” Brittany shrugs.

If it were anyone else saying such a thing, Santana would just roll her eyes and snap “Like what?!,” but since it’s Brittany and Santana knows that Brittany is a fucking genius, Santana lifts her head a little bit off the bed and quirks an eyebrow.

“What you thinking, BrittBritt?”

“Well,” says Brittany, a devious smile curling her lips, “do you remember sophomore year, when Rachel got the AV Club to bug the choir room so she could snitch on us to Mr. Schue when we weren’t singing?”

Santana rolls her eyes at the mention of Rachel’s name. “Yeah. How could I forget?”

Brittany full on grins now. “So I was thinking… Artie used to be in the AV Club.”

“And?”

“So what if we got Artie to put some bugs on us so that we could get Sebastian to admit what he did to Blaine?”

“Okay, baby, that bug thing sounds so wrong, but I get what you’re saying. Like, you mean we could get him to confess and then record it?”

“Totally.”

Now Santana smiles her wicked grin, too. ”I love the way you think, brilliant girl. And I’m pretty sure I know just the way to get that little twinky-dink to spill the goods on this one.”

Brittany runs a hand through Santana’s hair. “How, babe?”

Santana sits up and takes Brittany’s hands in hers. “Let’s just say that that kid has an ego the size of Cincinnati on him, but he doesn’t have the talent to back it up. I’m gonna pay a visit to Dalton and do what I do best.”

“San! You do not have permission to kiss him!” Brittany jokes.

Santana laughs. “Okay, no kisses, babe. Promise. I’ll just do what I do second best, then: get revenge.” She raises one perfectly shaped eyebrow, putting on a dangerous face, “I’m gonna make that dapper bastard wish he had never set foot outside Dalton. I’m gonna smear his face in the fact that I’m better than he is, I’m gonna get one back for our damn glee club, and I’m gonna get justice for Blaine, and you’re going to help me.”

“Awesome.”

“Totally.”

So later on in the episode, when Santana reveals what she did to the glee club and she asks Brittany to lock the door and Brittany makes that joke about how she doesn’t know how?

It’s all just sneaky!Brittana being sneaky.

Not only does Brittany know how to lock a door, she knows how to open doors, too. She was the one who served as the go-between with Santana and Artie. She helped Santana engineer her sting plan.

I bet Brittany was even fucking waiting in the car for Santana at Dalton and that she freaked the fuck out when Santana came back outside, covered in slushie, but Santana told Brittany to just drive because she got the tape and that’s all that mattered.

Until the show tells me otherwise, this is my headcanon.

Brittana are motherfucking superheroes.

Don’t mess with my OTP.